Last year, you insisted on doing your mother’s devasam in person along with Nachi in Chennai. Maybe you knew that it would be the last time you will do it for her in this lifetime….. From Chennai we went to Coimbatore in the Vande Bharat.
We spent ten days in Coimbatore before returning to Gurgaon. I just checked out your phone and as expected, you had taken screenshots of all our boarding passes. Last June 23rd, we all took the 8.45 am flight from Coimbatore ….. this 23rd, why can’t you take a flight from wherever you are and come home ?
Today – June 23, 2026
Today is 5 months since you left the physical plane…. and life as I knew it ceased to exist. Coincidentally I was shredding old bank statements and other papers today.
I also submitted my details for the intensive SIR (special intensive revision) at the G block common room, the same room where we did the initial SIR in Dec last year. For someone who was never late, I had to prefix “late” in front of your name. Well, along with the papers a part of my heart got shredded too.
Yes, I checked with Daviender before shredding …. these are from the one shelf that you didnt clear and the papers are from 2010 and before. Besides the bank statements and some ITR forms, I also found interesting stuff like our Sony TV’s bill, Sahara airlines ticket “book” and the receipt for our bus trip to Tirupati in 2006.
After this we went to Tirupati from Bangalore in 2007 and then the long gap till we went in 2023. Meeting Balaji After 15 Years !. We started the old practice of getting Balaji’s darshan every year… but he has once again made me cry. I am not angry this time, maybe because the pain of losing you is overpowering the anger for now. I was the one who wanted to get his darshan up close, but HE chose you to get closer to him…. and left me with no choice. Well, that’s a game where HE holds all the cards and we just assume, that we hold some.
The first message that I got from our Master says everything to us ….
“…Surrender is fear.
Love is not surrender. Love does not ask you to surrender. Love does not ask for anything. Love simply gives. And the miracle is, that when you give out of love the whole existence returns it a thousandfold, as if, from all over around you, roses start showering on you. You cannot imagine, cannot conceive of it, unless you experience it. But give it a try. You will not be losing anything.
Love is not something like a commodity, that if you give it you will have less of it. It is not money, that you had ten dollars and five you have given; now you have only five dollars left.
Love is not a commodity. It is not a quantity; it is a quality.
Give it, and you will be surprised that from unknown sources, from everywhere, love is flowing towards you.
Give it unconditionally, and once you have known the taste and the joy of giving unconditionally, you will also know that the existence is very generous.”
This is an excerpt from the book “From Bondage to Freedom”. To read the entire transcript click here – Love is Not Surrender.
Our love is unconditional and so it doesn’t die ….
Disclaimer – I post excerpts from Osho’s books and discourses and sometimes share his quotes. In most of the posts, the link to the full audio or full transcript is given. Osho is the Master, and to understand him, please listen to him or read his books. These excerpts are my limited interpretations with my limited understanding. Nothing original and I could be totally off the mark. The highlights and italics/bold font is also done by me.