My cousin Rohini had to go out for a couple of days and since we are within the same condo complex, she asked us to take care of her mother, my Mami. Mami is going on 91 … and Vedavalli (my Amma) is 81. Both are a handful and can take us all for a spin (literally and figuratively). 😁
Rohini left early morning today and Athimber brought Mami to our place by 8.45 or so. She came with a small bag and I asked her what she had brought – her shloka book, pill box, a notebook to write “Sri Rama Jayam” and best of all, a board game !!!
Mami got married to my eldest Mama when she was just 15 and my mother was 5 at that time …. Amma is practically like her first born and they have that kind of bond. They will argue and then make up as though nothing ever happened. Every summer holiday of mine, Appa ensured that we spent a few days at Mama’s place, so Rohini and Kokila (the younger siblings) became my defacto sisters and friends at that age. I have eaten biscuits made in a pressure cooker at their house. It was a novelty for me and when I reminded Mami about those biscuits today she immediately told me how to make them.
For a few minutes after their board game, Mami regaled us with stories from her time as a young girl. She spoke of my maternal grandparents (her in-laws) and her parents …. these are women from an era when girls were not educated and were married off early. They had to create their own space and their own identity. It was a tough life because resources were scarce, families were big, but they held their own, accepted changes gracefully and dealt with life’s challenges without too much drama. Unlike women today who can decide what to do with their lives, this generation made the best of the life handed to them.
I am yet to meet one 80+ “child” who sits and mopes around about how terrible life is. Some of them feel a little sad because they lost their spouses and a child maybe, but their grit to go on is phenomenal. Including my mother, they really take things in their stride. You may agree or disagree with the direction, style etc, but they are fine in their space. Some of them do end up being bitter and cynical… but when you see the kind of challenges they faced, maybe being bitter was the only possible outcome.
The deep seated faith in God and the belief that HE knows best has probably helped them weather the challenges. Has our generation lost that faith ? Or do we take ourselves too seriously ? Can’t remember when I played a board game with cousins or friends… the cellphone has taken over our lives. Now we play games on the internet with strangers who may not turn out to be nice people even !!!
Amma and Mami were so engrossed in their board game that Amma didnt even notice Krishnan and me cleaning the vessels :):). It’s her favourite activity but playing with her “Manni/Bhabhi” she forgot all about it.
Guess the slow life has some benefits after all !
As I showed her pics and videos from our Indonesia trip she happily quipped – “now, I have seen Indonesia”. :):)
Do watch this short video of Mami singing a Shloka –