Dearest Appa,
How time flies !! Today is 15 years since you had the cerebral haemorrhage. You survived the haemorrhage but never spoke again. You never recognised any of us till you left forever in Dec 2008.
Had been thinking of you since morning. There are so many things that we are doing currently that you would have enjoyed being a part of. ShikshaDaan, the road trips, OPOS, temple visits and ofcourse the way India is developing.
Have managed to get over many other things but I still can’t forget the early morning and late night phone calls from Apollo, Hyd and later Manipal, Bangalore. Every time we see an ambulance, we remember how it was several hours before you were attended to that day. I wish it was just shock like the first doctor said at Poulomi hospital and you had recovered to live a few more years :(.
It’s not that I have something to say to you, but just having you around was like having body armour. Nothing could harm me !
In this letter, I want to thank you for certain things. First, I want to thank you for saying “no” more than “yes”, particularly when I wanted “things”. At the time when I was a little girl, I wanted indulgence, but now I realise that all those no’s prepared me to face life. Today sadly, many children get whatever they ask for and as a result just give up at the first hurdle. Your “no” taught me to keep going if I really wanted something.
Second, I want to thank you for instilling in me the value of relationships. Amma keeps saying that Krishnan and I keep meeting friends everywhere we go, just like you would. I have also overcome my reluctance to connect within the extended family, and I am in touch with all my cousins. Have re-connected with many cousins and also keep in touch with those that I always have. In fact, I have several colleagues from every organisation I worked in still in touch with me despite the years that I have been out of the corporate world.
Third, I can’t thank you enough for passing on your “travel” gene. Guess that was Paati’s gift to you and you passed it on to me :). I know that every time we start the car, you are with us. Travel has widened our perspectives as much and sometimes more than any book has. It has helped us make new friends and see some amazing places within and outside India.
All that remains to be done is to get my health back in order ….
You would be thrilled to see Vedavalli becoming a pro at YouTube and Whatsapp. She told me just now that she knows how to copy/paste a message on Whatsapp. She was forwarding messages till now :). Amma says she is in a school and Krishnan is like the Principal. She has also made some friends here and even interacts with students when she travels with us for ShikshaDaan.
Guess what Nanagaru, I will be officially a senior citizen next year and I hadn’t even turned 40 when you left… guess such is time. Years just roll by.
Miss you and wish we could turn the clock back so that I get to sit on your lap one more time like in the pic below.
Lots of love Appa, Malu
What a beautiful pair and such a nice tribute to your father, Bindu. I’m still not familiar enough with Indian customs and language to know whether I’m using correct terminology, but each of your posts expands my understanding a little more. You were a beautiful little girl. Your father looks strong and sturdy and had intense eyes, even as you did, back then, and probably still do.
As I write from the other side of the world, on Friday, August 4, 2023, I think that time does fly. Just this morning, I’ve been re-reading my personal journal from July, 2013. At that time I was reading Benjamin Franklin’s autobiography, which covered the years during which he discovered the connection betweeen lightning and electricity. Franklin ended his autobiography in 1757, by our method of measuring time, and I wonder what he would think of how we use that natural resource now.
Thanks for sharing, Bindu. Love does know no time or place.
Thanks Katharine. I take after dad completely – I look like him, have his work ethic, and ofcourse his love of travel. The one thing that I didn’t get from him is his frugality. But I guess that’s because I didn’t like the frugality applied to me as a young girl 🤣. Dad is remembered fondly by almost everyone who knew him. That may not be the case with me but am ok with that. I tend to wander into controversial stuff a lot more than Dad did.
And yes your last line is true – love knows no time or place.
And I especially liked the last line of your reply. From what you have written in the past, you have been forced to learn frugality, too, over the years.
Wow, excellent tribute to your father. Salute you Bindu.
Thank you Sir 🙏
Sir. This is Kalyanam. Wherever u r Lord Vishnu will bless u. Lots of love. U r in my heart. God Bless All.
Thanks Kalyan.
Bindu. Understand your emotions. Still remember last few days of him recovering giving hope to see him. God should give the ability to continue seeing them post leaving us.