Democracy’s new spelling – Demo-CON-Crazy

On Monday the man who will take oath in Kar-Natak-ah is someone whose party lost 116/222 seats they contested in. He is supported by a party whose history started undemocratically with the first Prime Minister of this country being nominated rather than elected… and the rest as they say is “HIStory”. By the time I wrote the first statement of this blog, the date of the swearing-in is changed to the 23rd because the first PM’s grandson’s death anniversary falls on Monday. Since the first PM’s party is owned by his grand-daughter-in-law, the loser-being-made-king has to defer to her wishes. Ok, cut to the chase, why am I writing about this ? So what if all this is happening ?

One of my friends quipped on FB that he thought he understood democracy in school but now he is not so sure. I want to help my friend understand democracy. For starters, since 1947, the spelling of democracy has been changed in India. Just as we speak “Indian” Hinglish, we also have “Indian” spellings for English words. Democracy is spelt as “DemoCONcrazy” because the only party that is democratic is the first PM’s party – CONgress. Only they understand how to keep India democratic – by declaring emergency, by keeping their party members in expensive resorts so they don’t get poached by undemocratic parties, by arguing both sides of a case – the Governor’s discretion must not be questioned and it must be when he/she doesn’t support their claim, by the first PM’s great grandson comparing India to the failed state of Pakistan which got created because the first PM wanted to be the PM and not let that opportunity go… the litany is long and tiring.

The Chief Justice of India had to impeached till 72 hours back because he was not listening to the great DemoCONcratic party of the first PM …. but suddenly he became the upholder of demoCONcrazy as soon as he asked Yeddyurappa to prove his majority in 48 hours instead of 15 days. Sweet. The CJI will become undemoCONcratic in the next 48 hours when he refuses to defer the hearing of the Ram Janma Bhoomi case. You see, the Ram Janma Bhoomi is a DemoCONcratic fight to ensure an invader’s right to plunder is protected at the cost of hurting the faith of millions that is supported by archaeological evidence.

BJP won 104 seats and IS the single largest party with a massive voteshare. JD(Sick) has 37 seats and CONgress has 78 seats …. democracy is supposed to be the right of the people to vote in whoever they feel should form the government. Now Kannadigas have given the max seats to BJP so the logical conclusion is that BJP forms the government but suddenly there comes a party that very few people wanted and is joined by another party that has looted the state blind in the past five years and has just 78 seats and they form the government !! This is DemoCONcrazy not democracy.

The tweet below captures the sentiments well –

So the robber barons are back to rule the Silicon valley. If the original robber barons were after gold, these too are after gold, just the purified melted-into-a-bar kind. Well, with the glorious return of the robber barons, may the remaining lakes foam over in protest, may the potholes swallow a few of the robbed gold, may K J George find a large enough umbrella to hold over the many cities of Bangalore when it rains, may the first PM’s not-so-great grandson find his grandmother’s kitchens to eat at and may the first PM’s not-so-great grandson also learn to pronounce “Vishveshwaraya”.

Guess what, in democracy, you get the government you deserve – the Bangaloreans who went vacationing and didn’t bother to cast their vote, can now enjoy the consequences and hey, as you wait in your air-conditioned cars on some pot-holed lane in your great city for a couple of hours trying to get home that is 2 kms away do mull over your actions and hopefully better sense will prevail the next time around.

Jai Hind… as Subhas Chandra Bose meant it, not the first PM of our great nation.

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