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Dad and Osho



Dear Appa,

Both you men meant the world to me …. And both of you chose this day – to come and go !!! What a coincidence. Do you remember ? It was around 11.45 pm, four years back, I was coming back from Delhi and when the flight landed in Bangalore, I managed to reach Krishnan instantly … Only to be told you had bid us goodbye in this life. Krishnan was choked with emotion and I remember calling Vidya from the baggage terminal and she couldn’t believe it. We all thought you will pull through, but truth be told, you told me on Aug 4th when I was sitting on the floor at the IG airport in Delhi that you are leaving. I could just hear you tell me but I changed my stance because you fought back – in those 22 days in the ICU at Apollo, Hyderabad. The emergency doc finally told us that he had never seen anyone so optimistic 🙂

The first shock of seeing you behind all those tubes, when did you grow to be 70 years old ? The interminable wait to see your pupils move …. To be told that you had less than 1 % chance of making it and then to ask Krishnan to come back from the airport because you had a heart attack 😦 our world turned upside down, and we would all have walked on our heads for years, if only that would have brought you back ! You still managed to do all the fun things – the ambulance ride from Hyderabad to Bangalore (btw we used the same road last Sunday), waiting till every one of your favourite people could come and see you, even Balakrishnan uncle managed to come the week before you passed on and you waited for me to land before going. As I wrote in my email to that dedicated group of friends and well wishers who kept track of your progress – you lived a full life, fulfilled every dream and did all that you set out to do – so there is no sadness. Just a twinge that you needn’t have suffered so much, but what do we know what you wanted to accomplish….

So you chose this date to go … Did you know that Osho chose to be born on this date ? In 1931 🙂 I have a sneaky suspicion that you did know and chose this date on purpose. You were big on doing things right and also having fun, so this was your way of letting me know that I should be celebrating and not crying. So it was a celebration and it has been a celebration every year – and guess what, today was the gala dinner at ISB. Just what you would have liked to do.

Both Osho and you gave me many gifts – you wished me into this world as my father and strived to make me independent and strong. Osho just liberated me – from dogmas, beliefs and taught me to question everything. Both of you were big on celebration and both of you taught me to give. Both of you taught me how to be agnostic and non-discriminatory to religion, color, economic status, upbringing etc – by example…. And most of all both of you taught me to love life and live fully !! No half measures. So happy birthday to Osho and you (birth and death are revolving doors afterall).

Am sure in some dimension you guys are having a blast !! Enjoy.

Lots of love
Malu

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Categories: Daily ReflectionsTags: ,

2 comments

  1. I am sorry Bindu Ma’m…I could not find enough courage to read all through this post (letter to your dad)..my eyes have become bit wet!!!!

    Loosing someone close to your life, close to your heart is the most toughest experience that we sometimes have to go through.

    I will try to read complete post once again, when I will have courage!!!
    The only thing I could figure out that you are a wonderful daughter to your father…and I just hope everyone should be blessed with such kid.
    God bless you always.

    Cheers
    Pawan Kumar

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