Twenty two years back on this day Krishnan took my hand and walked around the sacred fire to make a public statement of what we knew six months back in an instant – that we were soulmates. Today I had to return the favor and take his hand to help him across another nature’s element, water puddles :):) since he has a tiny spur in his heel that is painful, and he was limping a bit. We have held each other’s hands across all the elements – water, air, sky, earth and fire, for many lives and will for many more lives. Happy anniversary, my dearest !
Nisha, my young friend who is married for eleven years asked me what gyan I had about marriage and I told her – know and expect your partner to change and accept the change, and don’t try to change your sweetheart into the image you have of him/her ! Very often, we try to change our spouse to be exactly like us and forget that we fell in love with him/her as they were, not as we want them to be 🙂
Krishnan and I have always loved the ways we have changed and our unchanged core… Neither one of us has tried to change each other to what we thought was right. We are independent and strong individually but the independence comes from knowing we have each other’s back and the strength comes from knowing the other is right behind you. We have common friends, we have joint bank accounts, we celebrate everything together and we can spend hours together, talking or just being around each other. We are also the most important people for each other – in every sense, we put each other first.
When I was in college I read in Linda Goodman’s love signs that the Taurean man waits patiently under the lamp post for the stupid Arian woman to return after running away to do her fancy and I knew then that I would marry a Taurean …. Dealing with my craziness can be crazy !
So Nisha – the only other advice would be (not applicable to you now) read books, figure out exactly who can deal with you and vividly create the image in your mind – the universe fulfils your wish, just like it did for me 🙂 Now, if you skipped through books, didn’t figure out exactly who can deal with you and had no image in your mind – the universe still fulfils your wish, it just takes a little longer to know that the person you married is meant for you and the fairy tale is just as romantic, just the sequencing is a bit off !!
This is the second time we are celebrating our anniversary in Jaipur, we were here in 1999. Some things have remained the same – the rains when we drove down here today, the crazy traffic in Jaipur, my short temper and our love for Rajasthani food. Many things have changed too – the entrance to M.I Road directly from the National Highway, our discovery of Rawat’s kachoris and Arya Niwas group of hotels for stay, and dinner at Chokhi Dhani instead of LMB ! Also getting a speeding ticket while driving on the highway. Incidentally the same cop who wrote my ticket also told us the new way to reach M.I. road – getting a speeding ticket saved us a half hour from an already long traffic filled drive :):)