“Friends”

Two days and two “friends” behave in a way that hurts…. One came from another city within India and didn’t manage to find even one minute to just stop along the way to meet. He was in Gurgaon within 10 minutes distance and didn’t meet, didn’t even think of asking us to meet. And the same person managed to meet two other “friends” in the same 1.5 days…. Degrees of importance I guess.

Before I tried to unsuccessfully recover from the slight, another “friend” from school comes all the way from the US, stays for a few days in Delhi and goes back…. Without even calling. I am unable to react, because before this happened, I would have bet money that it could never happen. That this “friend” would not even call if she was in the same city is unthinkable. Especially since she lives so far away.

Am I the fool here? The only grouse my mother had during my growing up years and even now is, I go out of my way for my friends and Krishnan always felt I put undue pressure on my friends to stay in touch. Maybe I am the one in the wrong here – I don’t understand this behaviour of “friends”. I can understand someone not able to meet when we are in the same city and staying really far – there is a friend that stays 45 kms away and it is not often that we meet, but we talk frequently enough. I can understand when people travel for work and have to go away without meeting, because of the tight schedules, if atleast you were informed. I can understand when you keep visiting a place and don’t meet in one visit, but meet in another…. I just DON’T understand the behaviour of both these “friends” and am truly upset.

Friendships, like plants, need nurturing and not calling and not meeting do not nurture, they take away the nutrition and introduce many non-nurturing thoughts. Am still upset, and will take long to remove the quotation marks around the word “friends”.

2 thoughts on ““Friends””

  1. Hi Bindu, I’m sure your friends had some genuine reason/s and they would be feeling sorry too, give them another chance… I know you will… TC

    Reply
  2. Bindu , I have to call you soon and try to guess the names of your friends who have been so letting you down . Probably you have to recategorise them , or rather since the english language does not have categories for them , you might have to put them in shades of friendship . All friends cant be the same ,also they might have put you in a shade that is lighter than the shade of friendship that you have categorised them in.
    Also , you might have to put yourself into their shoes and see their side (once in a while) ,maybe they had a reason or a problem or a situation that was overarching .
    Cheers and don’t fret.

    Reply

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